Graham Linehan's Poo

The best, and most disgusting, summation of the writing process I've heard in a while came from Graham Linehan on Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe a few weeks ago.

"Writing is a bit like having a poo."

You can't just decide "I'm going to write a new sitcom", sit down and expect something to come out.

You have an idea. You have to let it brew. Wander round the kitchen, drinking coffee and muttering under your breath. Let your Better Half worry for your sanity. Let the characters find their voices. Make notes. Lots of notes.

Then, you'll reach a point when the story has to come out. You can't contain it any longer. You're ready to fire up the laptop and start typing. It's a great release.

I think I'm at that point with my concept for a sitcom about the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. My agent didn't think the idea was too insane.

Normally, I'd write a treatment, run it past some people and see what they think. But, I hate writing treatments. Everything seems a bit lifeless. And, by the end, the script has taken off in so many different directions, the treatment has very little in common with what's on the page so I have to re-write it anyway.

Then I'd structure the story to within an inch of it's life. But I'm going to try something different. I'm going to take a more organic approach with this pilot. I know the characters. I know what's going to happen at the beginning, the middle and the end, but very little idea of how I'm going to get to those points. I'm excited.

Excuse me, but I have to go away and pinch an artistic loaf. So to speak.