All Time Top 5 Messiahs Part 5.

1. Superman - "Superman Returns"

Did you spot my deliberate mistake? I realised yesterday that all the entries were listed as number five. That wasn't me being egalitarian. It was me being a div.

But, yes, the greatest Messiah figure in popular culture has to be the Man of Steel himself. A celestial father sending his only son to Earth to be mankind's saviour? How much more biblical do you want? It's even an almost Christ-like pose in the picture here.

In hindsight, I think 'The Dark Knight' has spoiled us. It showed that you can marry intelligent character driven narrative to REALLY BIG EXPLOSIONS!!! But the action sequences in 'Superman Returns' are limited to him lifting a succession of increasingly heavier objects. 

But that's the problem with Superman. By having a hero who's invincible, you can't have anyone fight him. Unless you have some Kryptonite. But then, he can't fight back. And if I wanted to just watch someone getting beaten up, I can go and stand in Aylesbury town centre on a Friday night and watch it for free. 

Anyway, 'Superman Returns'. You've actually got him sacrificing himself for the good of humanity and his subsequent resurrection. It contains the line "The son becomes the father, the father becomes the son." and Jor-El, Kal-El and Annoying-Child-Actor-El becoming a holy trinity. It's Allegory 101. 

So, the right choice? 

All Time Top 5 Messiahs Part 4.

2. Brian Cohen - "Life of Brian"

Well, obviously, he couldn't be number one as he's not actually the Messiah, he's merely a very naughty boy. But it's what he represents. 

The "Life of Brian" shoot was  a troubled one. It survived funding problems, Graham Chapman's rampant alcoholism and George Harrison.

Nope. I can't do it. I can't try and be funny about one of the greatest comedies ever made. Just watch this Comedy Masterclass. 

Text Book!

All Time Top 5 Messiahs Part 1.

5. Buddy Christ - "Dogma"

It's Easter and I have a hankering for an all time top 5. As I'm already destined to go straight to hell, do not pass 'Go', do not collect £200, then why not the Top 5 Messiahs in Popular Culture? It is - after all - the Greatest Story Ever Told, even if they jumped the shark with the whole rising from the dead thing. 

So, five Jesu- What is the plural of Jesus? Jesuses? Jesii? I suppose the whole point of a Messiah is that it's not meant to be pluralised. Like the Lone Ranger. But with 12 Tontos.

Anyway, to the first entry. Marketing of Easter has grown exponentially over the last few years. In fact, Kids A and B have pulled all the Easter crackers and I'm wearing a paper crown of thorns. So today would be a good time to nominate Buddy Christ from the film 'Dogma'. As they say, "not the sanctioned term, just something they've been kicking around the office".

I also think that this would be a good moment to praise Kevin Smith. It's taken him only 15 years to achieve what it took Woody Allen 30 years. 

To have the public saying "I prefer his earlier, funnier films."